Find Your Voice
1 of 2 series
October is here and this is the month to speak out, step up, and support survivors against Domestic Violence.
Unfortunately, domestic violence and abuse does not discriminate against anyone, no matter where you come from, race, or status; it affects millions of women and men in this country and around the world. One in four women and one in nine men will experience domestic violence in their lifetime.*
Domestic violence and abuse aren’t just physical assault – it can be verbal humiliation, manipulation, stalking, coercion, threats, isolation, and degrading someone to the point that they believe it. Domestic violence and abuse are a way for an abuser to gain and maintain control over their victim. They may use guilt, shame, fear and intimidation to control their victims and their behaviors. Ask yourself…
Are you in an abusive relationship?
Does your partner:
· yell at you?
· humiliate you?
· criticize you?
· ignore or degrade your opinions or accomplishments?
· threaten to hurt you?
· destroy your belongings?
· threaten to hurt people or animals you love?
· control who you have relationships with and how often you see them?
· control how you live your life?
· control where and when you do things or go places?
· control how you use your phone or spend your money?
· act excessively jealous or possessive?
· continually check up on you?
· make you believe you are crazy?
· make you believe you can’t do anything right?
· blame you for their abusive behaviors?
· physically assault you in any way?
· convinced you that you deserve the abuse they provide?
· treats you as if you are their property rather than an independent person?
· treat you as if you are less than them?
If you answered yes to any of the questions above, it’s probably time to learn more about abuse and acquire a support system. Next, you may need to make a plan to leave your abusive situation. Seek out help through the National Domestic Violence Hotline. Through this hotline, an advocate can provide local direct service resources (safehouse shelters, transportation, casework assistance) and crisis intervention. Hotline: 800.799.SAFE
You are worthy of more than the abuse you have experienced. Take back your voice and your life, leave your abusive relationship. My wish is to lead survivors toward a path of recovery while providing compassion and, most of all, hope. This is way I have started #metoopartwo, so we as survivors can start focusing on recovery and healing after experiencing abuse.
Once we escape domestic violence or abuse, we need to put the pieces of our lives back together again, along with our self-worth. In other words, we need to heal the trauma of our past experiences. I want to help you Find Your Voice and have a life free of abuse.
I experienced domestic violence and abuse throughout my childhood, teenage years, and as a young mother of two. Until the day I decided to get help and get out. I didn’t do this alone, I had a support system that included family, friends, a therapist, an incest support group, and a lawyer.
In order to break the cycle of abuse in my own life, I had to educate myself on how abusive people control and manipulate their victims, so I could prevent becoming a victim a fourth time.
Once I was out of my abusive situation, I could see how abuse had altered my life along with my behaviors and beliefs. I went on a mission to never experience another abusive relationship again. I started to discover more about myself, along with what I needed to reclaim my power. Eventually I became stronger and more confident in my ability to choose healthier relationships. One day, I looked up and realized I had recovered from my past abuse and the trauma that accompanied it. Now I embrace healthy relationships with more happiness while teaching others how to heal.
Let me lead you toward a path of recovery and help you become more empowered so you can find more happiness and joy in your own life. Pick up your copy of Finding Your Voice and start your own healing journey.
Love,
Mannette
*http://www.naasca.org/2012-Resources/010812-StaisticsOfChildAbuse.htm